Rules I've set for myself going into each day:

1. don't act out of hostility or ill-intention, no matter how hurt I am.
2. avoid passive-aggression and talk things out wherever possible.
3. cherish and fight for the things that make me happy.
4. don't take things at face value, listen to everything and see every angle.
5. try to grow and improve every day.

that last one's the hardest.

oh LJ I would apologize but I'm afraid tumblr is just so much better than you!

Buuut a lot can change in a month or so's time, y'know? LJ's pace (read:slow) makes keeping track of life easier at least.
So all that's going on as of right now: ( life, love, fandom, hobbies, etc. )

So that's that, LJ. tl;dr life isn't too bad right now, room for improvement but who's isn't?

Hi lj, sorry I've neglected you a lot of stuff's changed since Fanime oh

So Beth and I's lease on our apartment expired. She has a big stupid dog so she wants to get a house. Whether or not she's buying said house or if we're renting is completely up to her, but we haven't found a residence yet so for the month of July I'm living at home with the folks (and one million cats but that's another story entirely), saving some money, doing some place hunting, and enjoying the food and close proximity to my workplace!

On the love front I'm finally brave enough to say it out in the open, balni and I are together. There was a lot of buildup to this I'm much too tired to elaborate on, but it feels like at least one thing in my life has finally clicked into the place it belongs. After so much thinking and stress and anxiety it really just comes down to this being how I feel, and I feel strongly about it, strongly about her, possibly more strongly than I've felt about anything in a very very long time. She's visiting in August and I'm really thrilled :')

NEWWWW FANDOMS Tiger & Bunny is silly and awesome and I kinda love it a lot even though I don't exactly know why.

Things that haven't changed? I still barely draw anything seriously, or play videogames, or do much of anything besides work, internet, sleep, repeat. Though I have tried to get working out again? Mostly for the benefit of my spine and cause I wanna look extra-nice when Erika sees me next too maybe.

Ah well... looking ahead toward a better future I hope! See You!

FANIMECON 2011
aka Grimace Con
aka sup fgt Con
aka baba ghannouge con
aka ADVENTURE OF THE BIRTHDAY CHEESECAKE

So this con is just a jumbled mess in my head so doing this entry has been kind of a struggle for my brain lmao but HERE GOES A GIANT TL;DR, IMAGE-HEAVY MESS

( Thursday )

( Friday )

( Saturday )

( Sunday )

( Monday )

So tl;dr lots of bros and great memories. Masq eats up a person's con, I pretty much spent $60 on a badge to be in the masq since I didn't get to actually shop the dealer's hall or AA at all at any point. I also didn't get to enjoy the company of very many people very often and that was really disappointing. We really did have so many things planned that fell through (fiestas, purikura, photoshoots, etc.) but despite all this I wouldn't say I had an unsuccessful con by any means! Thanks to everyone I did get to roll with, I miss you all a lot ♥ Too many folks to name buhh this post is fucking long so I'M DONE.

So this is the obligatory Fanime schedule, items bringing, etc. post.

LEAVING: THURSDAY MORNING, FLIGHT LEAVES DIA AT 11:55AM, ARRIVES IN SAN JOSE AT 1:40PM

STAYING: in 2 separate rooms that include auditoree, bisouspapillon, sailorsirius, balnibarbi, sppandaaa, Eli, Ash, Harris, Katsu, tenshiryuu, thisiscyrene, and their friend Keil.

COSPLAYING: KAITO (Vocaloid), Souji Okita (Hakuouki SSL), Date Masamune (Sengoku Basara 2 Heroes ver.), Akira (Togainu no Chi), Date Masamune (Gakuen Basara), possibly extra Monday cos kuku

ALSO DOING: skit rehearsing, skit freaking, skit performing (aka hopefully not passing out onstage), escaping to the BW ball, cgl gathering, eating all of the food, eating more food, maybe some drinking, more food, Apples to Apples?!, purikura, buying all of the things, in no particular order.

Okay I also need to make a list of things I'm bringing for people and that are being brought for me.

BRINGING FOR PEOPLE:
- Prussia wig for bisouspapillon
- Yukimura wig for auditoree
- Vriska shirt for Cassie
- ninja gi for Em
- black sheets for skit

BEING BROUGHT FOR ME:
- Kaito scarf, Okita sweater, Akira shirt, and 6 baseball bats by balnibarbi
- red tie for Okita by auditoree
- swords/sheathes by napkins
- Gakuen Yukimura top by sppandaaa

please holla if I forgot anything aaaaa.

livingdeadjules is coming over shortly and we're gonna catch up and put some final touches on cosplays so I can pack for tomorrow <3

shit son it's gonna be one crazy party.

seriously.

it's my golden birthday today and instead of enjoying it I'm having like the 100th breakdown over a stupid costume in a row. I've pumped an astronomical amount of worry and money (you don't even want to know) into this shit and every time I hit a roadblock I'm just ready to throw it out a window and cry pathetically.

I leave for Fanime Thursday morning.

I desperately wish I had someone here to help me because right now I'm battling a terrible headcold and lately my body hasn't been letting me sleep past 4-5hours a night (I have no idea why, it doesn't matter when I fall asleep, I wake up several hours earlier than I should). I'm a stressed, irritable, miserable wreck and all I want in the world is for this to work out after all I've put into it. It seems stupid to be such a mess over a dumb costume, but I'm like this because I've been giving it my all, having successes, only to repeatedly have it come back and present me with another wall of shit to climb over time and time again.

no seriously lj I'm sorry I am so full of neglect!

So I've been internet-less for like a month and a half now? It's been a sad sad life, visiting coffee shops and fast food locations just to use the wifi and briefly check emails/websites. But we have a modem coming in the mail probably monday! In the meantime, lots of things have happened.

- drawing a TON of fanart I'll forever be too lazy to scan
- I survived some crazy CRAZY rough weeks at work
- I have a new roommate, she's hilarious and crude and crazy and I've aptly nicknamed her "Panty".
- I've been struggling to orchestrate my cosplays for Fanime
- I've been struggling to orchestrate my GODDAMN HOTEL ROOM SITUATION for Fanime (more on this later)
- doing some gaming for the first time in many months, but pretty much only have the attention span for Basara
- lots of other stresses and adventures not really of note
except for
GAMOOGIECON.

So I basically took the past week off from work, cause my idkbff auditoree flew out to Colorado for a whole week and I just returned from dropping her off at the airport about an hour ago. We had many many adventures, ate many foods, played many video games, danced and sang to an assload of kpop, watched some anime, and got our ears pierced together. It was a blast, and a nice break from work but baww Gamie I misses you :'{

moving forward, I've got my work for Fanime cut out for me. Just bought my plane tickets today but I'm finally in a point where I'm not FREAKING THE FUCK OUT and getting it all manageable. Everybody rooming with me, I'm going to get all the costs ironed out by Tuesday, so I'll let everyone know what's up then ♥

til later, Livejournal!

Dear LJ:

how do I update you. I have nothing interesting enough happening in my life to post here, and tumblr, twitter, and formspring seem to have the bases covered as far as my day-to-day obnoxiousness goes. I'm feelin' a little too tired to type out much...

But y'know I feel a little disconnected from all but a small handful of my friends here on the 'net so I thought I'd pull out some sorta update.

I feel pretty disconnected from just about everything, really.

oh, thought I'd officially say I won't be at Katsucon. I'm going to do my very best to make it to Otakon instead, but aside from missing my East Coast buddies and feeling sad about that, I think I've made the right decision.

Beth and I are moving out of this apartment come the end of May. We won't be going terribly far, just looking for a house in the vicinity because she got this big dog I don't really care much for at all without warning me and I guess it needs a yard. We're going to be looking for more roommates but as of right now we're pretty set. Here's hoping that moving goes smoothly and with as little interfering with my happiness as possible, haha.

I have neglected my youtube as well as some other things I feel have sorta become my responsibilities, etc. and I feel guilty about it, but not guilty enough to muster up the energy just yet.

I should get my hair done on my day off. I could use a little change?

- ♥

ANIME LOS ANGELES 2011
the aftermath

So overall I had a great freakin' time. It wasn't too terribly expensive, I met and chilled with so many fun people, it was just a relaxing "do nothing and have Denny's afterward" convention.

( obligatory summary in outlined format )

basically done with everything on my cosplays basically.... (and I have the progress to prove it!)



Flying out tomorrow afternoon, getting to LA at 4-somethingorotherpm, eating delicious mexican food, styling wigs or something (I guess), etc.

Friday:
- Doggie group at 4pm
- Uminekos at 6pm

Saturday:
- MASAMUNES IN BIGASS PANTS
- MORE MASAMUNES, SCHOOLBOY VER.
- DATE HIPSTERMUNE

Sunday:
- idefk, see Saturday I guess
- flight home is at 8pm what

SO I DON'T FORGET, THINGS I'M BRINGING FOR PEOPLE:
- red hipster scarf and Yukimura wig for auditoree
- Meryl wig for hiphopelephant
- the YUKILUST


AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA